Perhaps I am too sensitive. I can accept that. Maybe I'm just too tuned into emotions, empathetic... or... conncections, or... I dunno.

And the last week or so has seemed riddled with little heartbreaks.
It began with me driving home one afternoon to find a hit, but not dead bird in my road... it picked it's head up at me, when I drove by, but didn't move. Upon further investigation, it seemed to have a broken leg... not a good prognosis..... So, I did what I could, by retrieving it out of the road, and releasing it into some of the thick underbrush, etc. in my back yard, where it would have a chance, if it had one to have. It was a young robin. Very sad.
The crippled puppy with the STUPID owner, might be yanked away from my Mom's good influence/care, because my the owner is verging on neglecting the puppy and my mom told her so. the owner's solution is to threaten to take it to a kennel during the days instead. Wonderful for a growing, special needs puppy. *sigh*. My Mom says she can not just keep the dog. One is enough. My heart breaks for what this puppy could be.
Some good friends of my Dad's are now getting a divorce... They (were) are the house in Jericho that I used to pet-sit for all the time, for weeks at a time... The have 2 wonderful dogs... Unfortunately, with the divorce, neither can keep the dogs, so they are soliciting homes for them. One is a mellow, well trained "yellow" dog... lab/retriever mix or something... My dad likes this dog too... and I tried to get my dad to take him... this particular dog would be no trouble. The dad says no, because of the dog hair, messes, walks, feeding... etc. etc. A lame excuse in my book. I'm sad for what is happening with these dogs... they're like kids being separated and caught in the crossfire....

I know all those things seem... menial or trivial... but... I dunno. Sometimes, I guess it's the pebble in your shoe that ruins the hike. Lately, even aside from the above examples, it has been the 'if only...' 's that have been fucking up my life....

Everyone around me feels... tumultuous... chaotic... Where is the steady ground?

I just feel powerless, across the board, to affect any change or good..... For me. For others. I hurt, you hurt, they hurt.... and it seems that there is nothing I can do, except make you know that I FEEL.

Bleh. I dunno. I need a weekend. It has been a ... hard. Week at work. And it's only Wednesday.

It all just makes me want to cry... I need a hug, or a hill... or a fork in my lawn, or colors in my hair, or SKYY blue, or a long walk in the leaves, or a long distance phone call... or.... A horse.
Something to remind me that once, there were simpler times...... And stoke the fading Hope that maybe there will be again....

Tags: animals, empathy, upset
You might find me at: War with the world...
I'm feeling...: uncomfortable
I'm rockin' out to:: Kryptonite...